Random. The past tense of rundom.

I’ve got nothing to say. Must be time for a blog post.

Many times I wonder what it’s all about. Then I remember to put my whole self in and put my whole self out. After a a bit of shaking, the world has new meaning.

Upon further reflection, the antecedent of the word it in the chorus is probably the Hokey Pokey, in which case we’re back at square one in the study of the purpose and meaning of the universal it of our existence.

Whatever it is all about is undoubtedly more perplexing on roller skates.

Roller skating. Now there’s a mating ritual I don’t mind leaving behind. The entire trip to a roller rink was one long demonstration of virility on wheels. Although it was also a chance to try to find rejected silver dollars in video game coin returns. I didn’t realize until today that they were metaphors of my own existence.

I really like a good metaphor. They are Swiss Cake Rolls in the sack lunch of life.

How does Little Debbie stay little?

Debbie Downer was the most peculiar SNL character of all time in that the first sketch was absolutely hysterical, but no future iterations were ever very funny at all. I suppose we should be thankful it didn’t have enough momentum to become a movie.

Coffee is like oxygen in that when I run out of it, I turn blue.

That reminds me. I need coffee. Now.

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